Ramblings of being a chronic new girl
Lately I have been doing some searching. I used to be content to live my life through work. Then I caught a glimpse of what is was like to have something outside of that when I met Scott. After that relationship ended, I have felt - a little bit more empty. I didn’t know what I was missing since I wouldn’t let anyone else into my life until Scott.
Now - I’ve finally allowed myself to want something that I have been denying for so long. I want a relationship - someone to care about - someone to care about me. And it scares me.
After reading this scripture, I came to some realizations about my life lately. I used to be the type of person that over-committed. I said yes, to everyone, all the time. It was exhausting. I decided to work on that aspect of myself, and in fact, I think I have gotten too good at saying no. I may need a lesson in saying yes.
I’m at a point in my life at the age of 24, where my typical day involves waking up, working out, working, a round of tv or reading and then bed. Wash - Rinse - Repeat. This is the life of my Mother as well - who is 54.
And I rationalize this with - oh, well I have a demanding job, I travel a lot, and I’m tired. But I have no one to blame by myself. I need to work on a balance of the yes and no in my life.
AND THEN I GET DRUNK AND I’M LIKE: